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Why a divorce coach?

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Divorce coaches are becoming more prevalent in New Zealand, offering practical support on co-parenting, financial matters before the lawyers get involved.


I asked New Zealand's first certified divorce coach Kimberlee Sweeney who has been practising for nine years, and she says they can help with communication, coaching and conflict management that can ease an often painful process.


Kimberlee says "I can work alongside the lawyers, and they will often communicate with me about the client and the progress and how I can support the client outside of the legal appointments.

Sometimes face to face, but now most meetings take place on line
Sometimes face to face, but now most meetings take place on line

"Generally, most collaborative lawyers are really well versed in engaging the divorce coach in the process, because it helps the client be a better client as well, supporting them before, during and after those legal appointments and meetings."


Many clients contact her at the 'should I stay or should I go?' stage, she said.


"They're trying to figure out whether they want to stay in the relationship and make it work, or whether they're ready to leave. And they want to explore what both options look like and what they can consider in the decision making before they finally talk to their partner."

She encouraged people to explore every possible solution for saving a relationship, particularly with children involved.


"One of the biggest tips is, I think, for the sake of the children to say you tried your best, you did everything you could before you called it quits. And then if you are going to end the relationship, be mindful of the children in the process - you are still going to be in each other's lives, you're going to be parents for the rest of your children's lives.

"Be mindful of how you show up and communicate."

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